still learning...

lately i feel i've been traveling through foreign land.  everything is different.  food, language, ritual, habit, street signs and landscape.  it's all very confusing.  and frustrating.  i'm sure there are some wonderful things i'm missing out my window, but i'm consumed with my survival in this strange land and so far have failed to see any landmarks that might make this journey a little less traumatic.

rhett & i were recently diagnosed with lyme disease.  we were bitten by ticks this summer while picnicking under our favorite old tree.  we didn't get a distinct rash (only about 35%-60% of lyme's patients got the "bull's eye rash").  we were a little tired...but it was summer and we were flying through all our favorite things.  

soon enough school started.  i was editing photos in front of my computer every day...but sore at the end of day...and so tired at night you would have thought i was running marathons in between photo sessions.  but i couldn't sleep...and then i started having chest pain.  and that sent me straight to the dr.  one night i thought i was dying.  crushing chest pain, heart flutters, pain in my left arm...and yet...i'm such a non-medical kinda girl...it took all this to get me to my local urgent care.  they did an EKG and said there was nothing wrong.  i said,

oh, yes.  there is something wrong all right.  i know it.  run every test.  diabetes, heart disease, lyme disease, I DON'T CARE.  

and i must have been pretty scary in that moment because, without another question, 

he did.  

Lyme's came back positive.  i was devastated   i have seen with my own two eyes how terrible this disease could be...i could hardly believe it was lurking in MY body.  my strong and young and capable body.  i got rhett tested the same day(because he was bit by two ticks the same day i was). he tested positive.  my momma's heart withered.

 we both started treatment in september.

if getting diagnosed with a potentially debilitating disease was not enough.

there is some very bad news about lyme's disease.  i'm learning more every day.  here is the information i've gathered thus far (in my own simple words),

if you don't get proper treatment for lyme's in the beginning stages, you could have it for the rest of your life.

+

it's very hard to get proper treatment

BECAUSE...

people think it's not here or it's not there or it's only in the northeast (including my urgent care dr and the florida health department).  

+

 it's a VERY politically clouded disease that the government doesn't like to talk about or acknowledge.  

+

insurances don't like to pay for the expensive treatments.  

+

 the CDC doesn't stand to benefit from lyme's research and they don't know enough about the disease to properly treat it.  

+

dr's get shut down for treating lyme's any way but by CDC guidelines (a few days or weeks of antibiotics).  they are getting their licences taken away for doing anything more.   naturally, there are very few dr's willing to take this risk.

all of this =

a very scary and unfamiliar journey for me and my little wonderboy.

luckily (for us) we have some friends here in florida that have been down a similar road.  they pointed us to some lyme literate medical doctors in the area (l.l.m.d.) right away and have eased the entrance into this strange land by their familiarity with all the things we are currently wading through.  while this is amazing and graceful...this journey has still been dark...for me.

lyme disease if not treated is thought to be linked to some very scary diseases like parkinson's, arthritis, lupis, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromialgia, and alzheimer's.  in my limited understanding it can lead to heart damage, organ damage and even death.  all from one little tick at a pretty picnic.

this is all so unfamiliar to me.  like a different world than i knew just several months ago.  my body feels like someone else's some days.  i hurt.  i ache.  i feel like my mouth won't make the right words and that's if my brain can find them.  every day is different.  it rarely looks the same.  it's confusing to me so i can't imagine what it looks like in my little boy's head.  

as a strong woman...i am frustrated. as a momma...i am enraged. as a daughter of a big God...i am learning.

i'm learning (once again) i am small.  i'm learning lots from this out of control feeling.  i am learning that i never really trusted Him to begin with.  i am learning alot about how to live today and let tomorrow worry about itself.  i am learning to wait and i am learning that He can do more in my waiting that i can ever do in my doing.  i'm learning the value of good health.  i'm learning about the art of taking care of others (as others care for me).  i'm learning that a call or text or pot of soup or apple pie really can mean HOPE to someone.  this whole thing has been a lesson in patience and humility and self control and joy. and i'm still learning...

come what may

as a child i hated roller coasters.  but i tried my best.  i nodded every time my mom asked if i wanted to ride.  i put my brave face on and envied my baby sisters as they strolled out the chicken exit.  but not me...<gulp> i rode every ride.  as i buckled myself into the ride fear bubbled in my stomach--not the excited kinda fear but the terrified.  i'd close my eyes and stomp my feet on the floor every loop and hill.  i hated every second.  i wanted so badly to like it.  i'd have to remind myself  itwillbeoversoon, itwillbeoversoon in order to make it through.  but if ever i was brave enough to open my eyes, i could see for miles!  hills and trees and houses and people...the view was beautiful!  i hardly knew because i spent most of my time with my eyes squeezed tight.  there is something about that free falling feeling i just can't take.

life feels a bit like a roller coaster right now.  God is the parent that buckled me in and promises me i'll be alright. He makes it clear that it's Him and not me that is in control.  i'd like so much to make Him proud so i put my brave face on and envy the others that take the chicken exit.  i buckle in and try my best.  at the loops and hills i close my eyes and stomp my feet and try to remember all my Father tells me about being afraid.  i don't like this ride.  some days i have to remind myself itwillbeoversoon, itwillbeoversoon in order to make it through.  if i dare open my eyes long enough...some parts of this ride are breathtaking--like nothing i could ever see from anywhere else.   the landscape is painted in shades of forgiveness and redemption, humility and kindness--the view is beautiful!  all beauty aside, there is something in this free falling feeling that i just can't take.  

but for Him?  

anything...

even this falling feeling.

faith?

trust?

whatever it is, i don't like this ride. but i'm buckled in and leaning towards Him--

come what may.

{adventure awaits}

i don't know about you but life keeps happening faster and faster for me.  days feel like minutes and weeks resemble hours and all the sudden i haven't updated my blog or given my kids a bath in wayyyy too long!  while a quick sniff can remind me that those little stinkers of mine are due for a rinse...my blog sits here waiting patiently for my words and photos while time gets away from me...

i was editing a session today when a photo jumped off the screen and made my heart flutter.  this one image brought truth and tears. i had to write.

the picture was of a bride and groom.  dana & ryan, the couple in the photo, have a captivating love story.   their tale is of a whirlwind summer romance that looks different and feels exciting, like nothing you've seen on pinterest.  last minute, they scrapped the stressful wedding day (which was really more for everyone else anyway) and they went to the courthouse and made promises to each other and God, just the two of them.  they decided that a lifetime was too short to fill it full of things that don't matter...and all they wanted to do was sign up for forever, so they skipped all the ordinary fuss.  they decided to do it all a little simpler...and with more personal meaning.  i loved hearing their love story and spending a golden morning capturing them embarking on their new and beautiful adventure.

their love story is truly inspiring, but there was poetry & gospel in this image that made me cry...  

*the way the groom is looking back and offering his hand for his lovely bride to take.  
*the way he is one step in front of her... anxious for them to get on their way up that pretty hillside, where all the wildflowers live.  
*the way her hands are full of white dress and blue baggage...
*the way she is making her way a little more slowly, choosing her steps carefully and minding her dress.  

the imagery took my breath.  

God refers to His church (me & you) as His bride and as i looked at this picture, all the sudden, dana and ryan faded to the background and all i could see was the truth hiding underneath.

the way the groom is looking back--stretching out his arm towards his love--reminds me of the God who claimed me as His own and wrote a beautiful story for me--packed with passion & adventure.  Daily He asks me to drop it all and place my free hand in His...and daily i deny His hand and make really good excuses as to why i have other things to do.  

like this groom, God has adventure on his mind.  He stretches his hand out for me to grab...but so very often my hands are full.  He's one step in front of me, anxious to show me the beauty that lies ahead...but my hands are busy...with silly frills and personal baggage.  i can't move at His pace because i have alot of practical things to carry.  there are things i must tend to.  and i want to watch where i'm going, so i don't trip and fall.  

because realistically, the bride in the photo will trip if she throws it all to the wind and tries to run in that dress.  if she doesn't fall on her face she'll get all dirty running along that dirt path.  not to mention that she probably really needs all that stuff in that suitcase.  these excuses ring with worldly truth and practicality and that's what makes it so hard to put it all down.  God asks me to travel lightly...and i keep thinking i am, i am.  but am i? really? or are my arms still too full of trifles (that look significant) to let Him lead the way?   

most days i turn away from His wild call--my house needs cleaned, bills need paid, work needs done, kids need bathed and these things really are important!  i don't think i can just let them go and ask Him what He wants me to do with my time, talents, love and money...  

it's all so very wild and free and extreme.  when He asks me to love Him and love others it sounds so simple but it lives hard.

i want throw it all to the wind.  i want to be the bride that runs in her wedding dress.  i want to be swept away by Him.  i want to step into my love story.  i want to grab His hand with both of mine and hang on!  i want to trust Him enough to take His hand and let go of everything else. 

i want to...but dare i?

funny how one picture can change your morning and your mind.  in the light of the truth hidden in this photograph, everything that usually fills my hands and looks important seems so very small.  in this moment, i can see His outstretched arm so clearly and know... 

adventure awaits...

{tree & sky: a love story}

the ever-green sings
to sky-blue, 

every moment 

of e v e r y day.  

they belong together. 

the evergreen was sculpted

sturdy 

and grounded--

the perfect match 

for wild sky

(who knows no bounds).

  

evergreen knows

no other way to be

than a lover 

of the sky. 

everyday

he lifts his arms--

everyday growing closer...

invadingthespace 

she craves.

he must be nearer still....

nearer still.

he loves her too much

to hesitate.

and unlike the other trees...

the seasons

don't make his leaves waver. 

his constant gaze

surpasses

the yellow ways of oak. 

the evergreen's love for sky... 

is resolute.

  

steadfast.  

unswerving. 

she's not always easy to love...

some days 

he must dig his feet in earth

and lean in.  

the couple couldn't compliment 

if they didn't also conflict.

sky loves him back...

in her way, 

with wind and sun.

  

she is vast 

and untethered...

surprising him everyday. 

her breezes make him quiver; 

her blue eyes wink from behind low slung clouds. 

she flirts in starlight--

when everyone else is asleep. 

although she is passionate and ever changing...

she is somehow 

always there.

  

her moods change by the moment, 

but she apologies...

in sunrise and sunset.  

when it's gray

it's her that pushes off

and withholds all hue...

it's ok.

evergreen understands "always"...

and knows that it is always sky 

that brings the rain.  

he has come to depend on it.

they belong together. 

though sometimes he is

*prickly* 

and his earthbound ways are dull.

she forgives because she knows 

she can be 

fickle

and cold.

for them,

forever is no question--

too much depends on tree & sky.

they belong together.

theirs is not the kind of love

that causes a great stir--

like sand and surf.  

they don't have people lining up. 

most times you walk right underneath 

and miss 

the constant conversation.  

but if you ever bother... 

to look up 

and in 

on this everyday love...

                           it's enough to take your breath.

God's plan for my tastebuds

as i was stirring my little red pot of chicken for burritos this afternoon, i was graced with a flash back of about 7 years ago.

i caught a glimpse of me in my kitchen trying to decide between spaghetti, something frozen or eating out (again).

i couldn't hide my smile at the memory.  i couldn't fight the joy that overwhelmed me.  i couldn't help but thank God for just how far He's brought me and that He even had a plan for my tastebuds.

see, when God says He gives LIFE...and life ABUNDANTLY...He means it.  not just in the ways you expect--but in ways you couldn't imagine.  i knew i was signing up for Him to change my heart.  i had no idea He wanted to reimagine the food i put in my mouth too.  the wildness and mystery of our God is what i love most about Him.  i can't even guess at what He's gonna do next...i'm just learning to hold on tight...it's gonna be amazing.

growing up, we didn't eat out much.  we mostly ate at home.  my mom cooked the same 5 meals in rotation...spaghetti, tuna casserole, fish sticks, chicken with rice and pizza. i didn't have any complaints about these meals.  in fact...i loved em.  but i had no idea what i was missing...

<enter eric.>  eric eats everything.  eric likes everything (except for cooked cabbage).  i was so lucky to meet the love of my life at 12...(crazy, i know) but he loved me through my awkward years so i had to hang on:)  eric (and his family) took me out to eat more times than i'd ever been in my entire life.  we went for mexican, we went for italian, we went for burgers and we went for pizza.  everywhere we went...i ordered chicken fingers and fries.  he'd try to talk me out of it.  he'd beg me to try a bite of his mannicotti or his white pizza or his fajitas or his burger with an egg on top.  but i loved my chicken fingers and i was loyal to those little guys.  i didn't think i was missing out at all...

truth is, i grew up in a pretty fearful family....and that fear transferred over even to food.  my mom was a picky eater and only cooked what she liked and warned us about all that other nasty food.  and so...i bought in.  my culinary world was small and safe.

when i was about 15 i started to wear down a bit...eric convinced me to try some different things...and i did. including chinese food....i'd never had it before.  now i can't imagine living without that wonderful flavored MSG!  those crab rangoon...that fried rice and spicy chicken!  i didn't love it at first but i warmed up to it...and then i couldn't get enough.  slowly, slowly i started trying things...but nothing too crazy.  to this day eric laughs at my adventurous eating (and takes full credit for it).

when eric and i got married and had kiddos...cooking was a "thing".  i was the tomboy of the family and had never been taught to cook much of anything but spaghetti.  i also had an aversion to cooking for a man.  it felt a bit primitive to me.  i hated the societal expectation, i hated the loneliness of the kitchen and vulnerability of making something for someone....all of that aside...i didn't have the foggiest idea of how to actually cook.  what do people even eat?  i knew i'd had my fill of tuna casserole and fish sticks but...what else do you make?

eric was super sensitive to my craziness about meal preparation and he never expected me to cook.  in fact,  (i'm ashamed to admit this but)  i wouldn't even let him leave me in the kitchen alone...for real.  he either helped me cook or sat and talked to me as i stirred my something frozen or strained my spaghetti noodles.  i can't say enough about his patience with me in this area.  i was sensitive to feeling like someones servant...he thanked me and made me feel like a queen for making simple pasta with red sauce out of the jar (and still does).

life took some crazy turns about that time in our lives and our whole world kinda turned upside down.  (that's the tidy short story)  God, so mercifully, caught us and set us upright again....and somewhere in there awakened my taste for all His world had to offer.  somewhere in the upheaval i found freedom...fear no longer had a place in my decision making.  oddly, even my food choices.  there is freedom in facing your worst fears...and walking through them....because if you can make it through that...what else do you have to fear?  certainly not shrimp scampi, salad with fruit in it, burgers with guacamole on them and  yucca fries dipped in coconut sauce!

somehow, i became a culinary adventurer.  i tried everything set in front of me.  some i liked.  some i didn't.  some i LOVED!  but the fear was gone.  food was just exciting.  food began to be an experience for me.  trying new restaurants with friends and discovering new favorites was like my new hobby!  i fell in love with foods i had never before tasted.  i was amazed at all i had missed out on for so long.

one problem...i still couldn't cook.

somewhere in the crazy shuffle of life i figured out some of the issues i had with cooking.  cooking for someone was alot like...love.  and the problem was, lexi didn't love well.  there was something about offering something to someone that seemed raw to me.  it all seemed unguarded and risky.  well...my new life was one big risk and God's love fed me and maybe...just maybe...cooking something...offering up myself, was possible if He was by my side.  the idea of giving away just a taste of the love He had lavished upon me was a step into grace.  so...i started cooking.

baking came more naturally to me.  desserts are easy to please....no one is counting on you and i'm pretty good at making things pretty.  so i startedwith desserts.  muffins, pies, cakes, fried cinnamon tortilla chips. i called my friends for their favorite recipes and...

i know it might sound silly but God really used 3 of my good friends to teach me how to cook.

lyndsey taught me what it looked like to feed your family every night.   night after night she cooks and cooks and cooks...rarely the same meal.  she meal plans each week and tries new and scary things all the time...some times it is wonderful and sometimes her family agrees it's nothing they want to make again...and either way...it's okay.  i know that's simple but...for me it was big.  i still call lynz with cooking questions.  there are a few of her meals i make that i literally call her every time i make them...for the temperature...or an ingredient ..or just to tell her how excited i am to make her recipe!  her kitchen is the most wonderful place to be.  i love to sit on her counters and chat.  oh, another thing?  you haven't had thanksgiving dinner until you've had lyndsey's.

courtney also taught me how to cook.  she is my healthy friend.  she taught me about agave nectar and other sugar substitutes.  she taught me about balanced meal planning and to shop around the outside of the grocery store for the fresh stuff and skip the middle as much as you can.  she graduated me from cooking out of boxes to breaking out a cutting board and making my own.  i don't buy canned anything because of her.  because of her i know that the best produce is fresh or frozen.  she taught me how to read a label and any time i need to know the very BEST recipe for something simple...i ask court because i know she has made it 5 different ways and has settled on the winner.

my last cooking hero is sara. her food belongs in magazines.  she is one of the most creative cooks EVER!  we joke that i think in colors and she dreams in scent and taste.  she's in love with produce.  seriously...i think she talks to it as it ripens on her counter:)  all my favorite recipes are hers.  she creates crazy food combinations and blows me away consistently   she cooks everything from scratch...her seafood lasagna, pink and yellow muffins and margarita cookies are 3 of my very favorite things i've ever tasted.  every night her husband has the joys of tasting 5 star food...sara just started an amazing blog called a patchwork picnic here.  make her food.  it will never disappoint.  http://apatchworkpicnic.blogspot.com/

today...i meal plan and scan pinterest for new and fun things to try.  i have bulging recipe folders filled with all my favorites, some of sara's and lynz' and court's.  i make dinner by myself most nights...which is big for me:)  and i like it.  sometimes i love it.  i like making colorful things...i like making things from scratch.  i like making eric's favorites and what i like most...is having people over and feeding them.  it's crazy just how far He's brought me!!!

anymore, eric and i love looking for interesting and local places to eat.  most nights we can't help but try the craziest thing on the menu:)  it makes me laugh at just how little that looks like the old "me"!!!  i can't tell you how long it's been since i had chicken fingers!

there is a reason psalm says, taste and see that the Lord is good.

He's so good....He even has a plan for your tastebuds!

at least He did for mine...isn't that just crazy?!?

waking up

i'm just coming out of my winter doldrums and for the first time in too long i feel excited for life. i'm writing and sketching and singing and dreaming.  i wonder if this is how the flowers feel in spring? is this the same sensation that makes those little seeds rise out of the mud and put some purple petals on?  it must be something similar because if i were a seed i could see myself doing the same.

wonderboy has a fascination with seeds and growing.  he told me himself the he is "ovsessed" with seeds--avacado seeds, apple seeds, mango seeds and (especially) green bean seeds.  he picks em out and puts em in his pocket so we can plant them and have more.  i love his appetite for life!  this weekend we are planting a lil (mini) garden of our very own and asking the God of the seeds to whisper his magic on them so we can watch them grow.  i'm so excited for my kiddos to help bring something to life!

spring is so full of possibility.  even though i live in an amazingly mild climate...i have the fever.  that lovely spring fever that overwhelms my life with beginnings every year.  all my best ideas are born in spring.  there is something truly enchanting about the season change and the earth erupting in lavendar and gold and green.  my mind and soul can't help but join in...dreaming new dreams, making new things, and grabbing all my tomorrows and giving them a healthy shake.  

i've been living life half asleep lately and it feels so good to wake up to this world.

I’m ready, God, so ready, ready from head to toe. Ready to sing, ready to raise a God-song: “Wake, soul! Wake, lute! Wake up, you sleepyhead sun!”

--psalm 108:1-2

 

dawnless mornings & seaside sunrises

i live by the atlantic ocean.  every day the sun comes up over the water creating golden poems & coral prose. some days i'm there to watch it all unfold like my favorite story.  but not most days.  most days i'm cuddled in my bed...glorying in those coveted moments when my husband leaves for work and i get the whole bed to myself.  i've gotten up for the atlantic sunrise a handful of times since i've lived here...and each time i am convinced that the golden show was worth every minute of lost sleep.  each seaside sunrise is my Father's gift to me.

i can't see a sunrise without it reminding me of a sept 4 years ago where when the sun didn't come up quite so beautifully.  i was driving in my car...after a sleepless night.  "the" night after which my life would never be the same.  my husband of 7 years had just told me our story together was over.  i knew it was coming...things were bad...but i couldn't have been more devastated.   after staying up all night in shock, trying to figure out what my tomorrow looked like, i jumped in the car and decided to drive towards the sunrise.  i was hoping the sunrise would be God's love letter to me the very morning i thought i needed it most.  so i drove east and cried.  i drove into a black sky that slowly turned a shade of darkest indigo and then slate...and then light gray and finally white and it started to rain.  that was the morning the sun didn't come up.  the one damn morning i really needed it to.  i was watching and waiting.  i wanted the pink and yellow sunrise to be my link to the God who painted it.  i wanted this sunrise to symbolize a life of me putting one foot in front of the other and doing life alone  and THAT morning...the sun came up quietly behind clouds.  no gold.  no coral.  no poetry or prose. no love letter to a lost soul.  i begged God for a brilliant sunrise.  and i cried all the harder when it didn't happen...not even a few golden rays.

the next few months after my dawnless morning were a pure and simple miracle.  somehow, as only He could, God put me AND my marriage back together.  He didn't just tape the broken pieces together with duck tape either--He sewed it like a tapestry...making the ugly, broken pieces look like His best artwork.  i won't lie--it was hard.  it hurt.  there weren't many sunrises...most mornings looked quite gray.  but He made something from nothing.  He created something beautiful in me through such an ugly time.  because i had come through the worst i was fearful of nothing.  i learned who i was and what was important.  the God of the universe pruned my life and gave me and my husband a partnership we never had before.  we trudged through this dawnless season and came out on the other side, together.

today i live by the atlantic ocean.  me and my husband of 11 years and our 2 beautiful kids.  every day the sun comes up over the water creating golden poems and coral prose. The great God of the universe might not have given me a sunrise over some soggy missouri soybean field that morning 4 years ago but every day i live here He makes it up to me.  i've come to the conclusion that i was asking the wrong question on that dawnless day. i was asking God for a simple soybean sunrise to tell me i would be okay ALONE.  He didn't wanna make that promise to me.  He didn't wanna send me that love note.  He had a little something else in mind.  a lot of pain, a bit of growth and hundreds of special oceanside sunrises with my childhood sweetheart by my side. today i am a stay at home momma who gets to write and read and walk by the ocean.  i get to paint and create and dream big dreams with nothing holding me back.  today i know myself deeper and more fully because in those miraculous months after the sun didn't come up i begged God to tell me who i was...and He did.  the last few years my life look alot more like i always wanted it to and never dreamed it really could.  i get to live life next to a man that lives his dreams and plots on how we can better raise our little family.  a man who chooses life instead of the fog of work and admiration and success he used to be lost in.  a partner i can lean on and respect.  today, God busies Himself giving me gifts like these i didn't know to ask for.  gifts i take for granted like the atlantic sunrises i often sleep through.  This Father of mine gives the best gifts--not the ones we ask for, but the ones we don't even know are available.  not the one lonely sunrise but countless seaside dawns lovelier than my wildest imaginings.  

taste & see

dear new year,

   thank you--once again, for the fresh start.   usually i meet you with a long list of resolutions...things i want you to help me change.   along with the list, i harbor secret hopes and demanding expectations for your days.  i'd like to apologize for past years.  i'm so very sorry--i am a bit of a bossy dreamer.  i have these great ideas and i just get to thinking that they are the best thing for me and you.  i know typically, if we don't ride off into my whims and adventures i tend to sulk a bit.  my Creator made me quite determined to milk the most of my minutes on this earth and so sometimes i bring life to your days with my dreamy ideals and other times i kill your moments with my demands of them. i guess it's my best and worst quality.  so, as you know, i usually pack your january with a bunch of dull things i really don't like (but i think it's for the best) and then, come february,  my resolutions have faded and shame and regret take over.  oddly enough, the good list i greet you with in january always seems to become the judge of my life and i am weighed down by it and no longer able to fly free...

this year, if it's okay by you-- i'd like to do things a little differently.

i've decided to revise and revive the list.  i'm changing my focus this year.  i'm not inviting any negative voices in to preside over us.  while i am still making a list for us--instead of making the usual grand plans--i am aiming to live in your smallest moments and make room for my Father to join me.  my theme is: 

taste and see. 

(psalm 34:8)

Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see—
how good God is.
Blessed are you who run to him.

so this year i'm making a list of wonderful things to taste and see.  things i don't wanna miss.  i want to make sure i squeeze them all in somewhere between your january and december.  instead of the usual skinny and self disciplined resolutions i'd like to go with something that cheers on life and creates space for the Creator to do something wonderful. this time next year i want to look back on a year where i tasted and saw that He was good...and i didn't hesitate to run to Him.  so here's our list:

1. try new foods at every culinary intersection.  when given a choice...get adventurous.

2. buy some pretty local produce.  taste it.  see it.  find His goodness in it.

3. go to the beach more.  it's like thanksgiving for your eyes...and it's just 10 minutes away.  waste the gas and just go.

4. drink more tea.  drink it slowly.  drink it with friends.  drink it with the kiddos.  note the taste and color...

5. find your very favorite color in this whole entire world.  name it.  frame it.  collect things this color all year long.

6. eat more peanut butter...share any new peanutty recipes with family, friends and strangers.  see what happens.  

7. go one day without seeing (no contacts)

8. go one day without tasting (fast)

9. celebrate beauty unabashedly wherever you find it. don't let it go unnoticed.  in people.  in places.  inside, outside.  let this year be a beauty hunt.  collect it when you can, take a picture or put it in your pocket.  open your eyes and see it everywhere.

love,

love,

love,

lexi